Wednesday, December 29, 2010

just can't get enough.

So I've been thinking... a girl [or just I] can never have too many:

White camisoles/tank tops, preferably long enough to layer when paired with leggings.

Black leggings. Or just leggings in general. I've recently become a fan of the equestrian-inspired ones!

Boots. Boots. Boots. & Lots of 'em!!
Not to mention how badly I want the tights in the last picture...

E.L.F. Mineral Eyeshadows

ChapStick in Spearmint = phenomenal!

Smell-goods... as I like to call them. Candles, reed diffusers, B&BW Wallflowers, spices. You name it. A room that satisfies that ol' olfactory bulb is essential!

Scrumptious scarves-- I absolutely love scarves this time of year. The twisted scarf & infinity scarf are some of my favorites!

Turquoise. Looks good with almost everything! I love neutrals during the fall/winter, & turquoise is one of my favorite ways to add some color!

Comfy pants. Enough said!!

I've recently bought these Daphne bracelets from 31bits in every color!! I love them!!

A few things I hope...
...that everyone had a very merry Christmas with their loved ones.
...that everyone is ready to ring in the new year, because it's almost here!!! Happy one!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Resolution Schmesolution

Well, Y2K10 is officially coming to an end. You know what that means! New Year's resolutions! My skin crawls at the thought of trying to think of a self-help "goal" on a time restraint. You mean I have to come up with a habit breaking or habit forming [thing] that will ultimately make me "a better person" by the end of 2011? Talk about pressure! I found where I had written a few NYR's in my journal from this past year:

1. Stop popping knuckles.
I may not pop my fingers as often, but I pop my wrists every. single. morning. And my elbows.

2. Don't impulse buy.
I can practically hear you laughing at me. Stop it.

3. Work out 2x/week (+).
The fact that I put (+) at the end to indicate "or more" really chaps my ego... as if I thought biweekly was for the birds or something.

Writing a recap blog post of the whole year is nearly impossible. I think [0ne of] my 2011 NYR's is to journal more- to take 10 minutes at the end of each day to write a quick note to myself. A quote from that day, a thought, a frustration, a prayer. I used to keep a hefty diary back in high school and somewhat during the past year and a half or so. If you know me, you know my tendency to forget a lot of things. I'm a documenter. I remember things through pictures, journal entries, blog posts, tweets, wall-to-wall posts. I have a lonely blank journal on my bedside table that I should start writing in...

...Maybe I'll get to that next year.

Journal entry: January 7, 2010
{.. "The ability to love people as we should only comes from the security of knowing we ourselves are loved. For you cannot share what you do not have."
-Having a Mary Spirit
I love this quote. I guess if I can't do much, I can treat people with love. That is step 1. ..}

Monday, November 15, 2010


...Something to Think About...

1. I'm going to grow up and open an Asian restaurant. I'll name it "Wok This Way."*

2. Then I'll open a clock store next to it. I'll name it "Tok This Way."*

3. Is it okay to not use your blinker if you are in the turn-only lane?

4. I compulsively smell the inside of books. There's something about the ways they smell that I just love! So you can imagine the fun I had at Barnes & Noble today...

5. Does anyone else think that McDonald's smells like childhood? I walked into a McD's for the first time in a long time, & the smell of it instantly took me back to Central Mall in Texarkana... specifically to the corner by Sears where there used to be a McD's.

6. It's okay to secretly pretend that being at the front of the line when the light turns green is really being at the front of the line when they wave the flag at the Daytona 500. On your mark...

7. I hardly ever eat the very last bite of a burger or a sandwich, or anything that is in any form similar to a burger or sandwich. Don't ask me why, because Idk. I just dk.

8. I thought of a quote today & it made me laugh:
"Apparently she hit some lady that stopped on the interstate."
"What was an old lady doing walking down the interstate?!"
~Courtesy of Lindsey McD. Thank you, Lindsey McD.

9. If numbers 1 & 2 didn't make you think of Aerosmith's "Walk This Way," then I apologize for being too witty for ya. ;)*

10. It's Monday. Which means one thing: Gossip Girl (I actually just typed #GG... #toomuchtwitter?) It's calling my name.

"You know you love me, xoxo"

*I wish I could take credit for that idea, but unfortunately I can't. I read it on twitter a long time ago: @davebarnesmusic. However, I think it's brilliant & funny all the same :)

Thursday, September 23, 2010

it's AUTUMN!!

I came across a blog the other day via Rachel's blog {which you should all read- it's amazing!}. One post in particular caught my eye. It compares football in the north to football in the south... & it's definitely worth a read! Check it ouuuut:

Football in the South.

I just spent an hour looking at old pictures from college and laughed my butt off the whole entire time!! It really made me realize how much I miss college and how much I miss the people I became close to. Needless to say it got me really pumped up to see everyone this weekend and several more times within the next month! I was going to post some of those pictures, but then I realized picking "only a few" pictures was beyond impossible for me to do. Oh well!

And finally, happy FALL everyone!!! {Does anyone call it "autumn" anymore??}
I love fall for lots of reasons: Halloween, pretty trees, cooler weather, BOOTS, football, leather jackets, the list could go on & on & on & on... Not to mention my shows are finally back on!! Another good thing about fall? Fall back babyyyy! Love gaining that extra hour :)

Friday, September 17, 2010

Forgetful Friday

So I didn't necessarily forget about blogging yesterday... I simply didn't feel like it. But I had to use "forgetful" in the title of this post because I feel super cool using an alliteration, duh! I really don't have too much to say... probably because I just woke up from a nap :).

Jimmy posted a link on Twitter earlier this week that I just have to share! Random Thoughts of People Our Age. I found it funny how I've had so many of these thoughts, & I'm sure most of you have, too! I'll share a few (like, er, 10) of my favorites with you:

5. Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.
-I don't know how many times I have done this!! At Wal-Mart, the mall, UAMS, UALR campus looking for the HR office... Pretending to talk on my phone is my go-to cover, until it rings while I'm "talking" on it.

9. There is a great need for sarcasm font.
-Amen! Especially when texting!

11. I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.
-Yep. The Other Sister, Finding Nemo, Ice Age, Tommy Boy...

12. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
-Now THAT is a good Q... I just roll mine up like a sleeping bag.

15. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.
-I agreed with this one before I finished reading it.

22. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?
-Sometimes I'll nod and smile... then 10 seconds later ask "What?" one more time.

27. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
-Morbid, yet true.

35. Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a problem....
-"And one interesting fact about yourself!"

42. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
-Vain, but you know we all do it.

53. I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.
-And also that no one wants to pass them on the interstate...

I'm glad I woke up when I did... because the UPS guy banging on my door while I was asleep may have caused a heart attack...

Thursday, September 9, 2010


TGIThursday, because that means tomorrow is Friday!! :) I've got a few interesting stories for you from this past week:

1. My phone bill last month was a little more than I had expected, and that's an understatement. So I went in to Verizon on Tuesday to check that out & look for mistakes. Records show that I did indeed go over my minutes by a WHOLE LOT. Sweet. (Tori Tedford, I need to add you to my "Friends & Family 5" because your number was all over that call history like white on rice!) Anyway... to the interesting part... There was a couple in there who was checking out next to me (they looked about 18-20 years old). All of a sudden, the boy runs out of the store to get in his girlfriend's car and chase after whoever had just stolen his truck right out of the Verizon parking lot! Right there! Idiot. Makes me wonder if the boy had left it unlocked &/or with the keys in it... that's just asking for someone to take your car!

2. I forgot to mention in my last post that 2 of my best friends have recently gotten engaged!!! This is huuuge news! I am beyond happy for them, & I can't wait for the festivities to begin-- showers, parties, etc. I'm also really excited to be a bridesmaid for both girls! I went from never being a bridesmaid to having 2 gigs within 2 or 3 weeks! I can't wait!! If I had any talent at it, I would be a wedding planner. That's gotta be such a fun job!

3. A few things you [probably] do not know about me:
i. I love the Progressive & Geico commercials. I especially love the Geico commercial where the boss wants to do the little exercise called "I fall and you catch me." It's hilarious! Click here to see it.
ii. I like a good cry every now & then... it makes me feel refreshed!
iii. I love picture messages! I like to send them & I like to receive them. So it only makes sense that I like when people post twitpics.
iv. I haven't read Cosmo magazine in over a year... possibly a year and a half, two.
v. I do this weird thing where I don't eat the last bite of burgers or sandwiches. I don't know why, but I just don't eat it. Unless it's a #1. Original from Schlotzsky's...
Salutations! (Does that word make anyone else think of Charlotte's Web?)

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Off-the-Wall Thursday

So in lieu of having long posts every 2 or 3 months, I'm going to try to keep it light and update more often. Granted I just blogged 2 days ago, there's no better time to start "Off-the-Wall Thursday" than on this rainy Thursday. I'm not sure yet what I'll do every Thursday, but I'm going to post something random... outside the ordinary... weird... off-the-wall (hence the name). So for today, I'll leave you with a list of 5 random things about me that you otherwise may not know.

1. I don't normally buy sugary candy. If I'm in need for a little pick-me-up, chocolate is my go-to. Now this doesn't mean I don't like sugary candy-- I wouldn't go that far! Skittles... I like Skittles... I'm somewhat OCD when I eat them, though. I eat the green & the yellow first, because they're my least favorite. Then I eat the purple and the red ones simultaneously, because they just taste good that way. I save the orange ones for last, because I think they taste like orange Tic-Tacs. And I love orange Tic-Tacs.

2. Facebook annoys me sometimes. I hide people from my news feed all the time. I don't necessarily want to de-friend that person, I'm just not interested in keeping up with people on facebook that I don't know very well.

3. That being said, it only makes sense that I ignore a lot of friend requests. If our mutual friends consist of ever sorority girl at the UofA, there's a good chance I won't accept the request. It's not because I'm trying to be mean, but if I don't know you, I don't know you.

4. If I had to pick any beverage (other than water) to drink for the rest of my life, I think I would pick sweet tea. No lemon, please. :)

5. I like to do a little wardrobe cleansing every now & then. I like to go through my drawers and my closet and get rid of the things I don't wear. Out with the old, in with the new!

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

"Ramblings" is perfect for this post...

Wow... no blogging for 3 months? I swear I'm still alive, for those of you that read my blog but don't really keep up with me (I really do enjoy your fb messages, though!). I don't even know how to begin any sort of "intro," so we'll dive right in and play catch-up.

First of all, I can't believe summer is over & I've already started my very last year of school... ever (hopefully). It's really weird to think that a year from today, I'll be scribbling "MS, CF-SLP" (then 9 months later changing it to "MS, CCC-SLP") behind the chicken-scratch I like to call my signature. Oh, but not only that, I'll be WORKING... making a salary... and living in [insert city not in Arkansas here]. This time last year I was settling into Little Rock -- getting to know my classmates, using my Garmin to get me everywhere, hoping school wouldn't be too hard and trying to figure myself out a little bit better all while sporting long brown hair. Five hairstyles later, my classmates are some of my closest friends, I only use my Garmin occasionally (ok, more often than not), I still hope school stress doesn't get the best of me and I still don't know who I am for the most part (although I hope it's safe to say I'm not the same person I was 365 days ago).

But let's be honest, no one really completely knows who they are and what they want in life at 23 years old. Thank goodness that God has a plan and a purpose for me, and all I have to do is sit back, trust Him, & jump when He says, "Jump." But let's get real for a second, it's so hard to do that. We as humans are control freaks. In "Having A Mary Spirit," it's put this way:
Fear in its purest form is really unbelief, the false conviction that "God can't, God won't... so I must." Faith, on the other hand, chooses to believe that "God can, God wants to, and God will... so I choose to trust Him with my life."
All life challenges present us with a basic choice: fear or faith. I can only pray that as this school year winds down, God gives me the patience and the courage to be faithful. That being said, I hope God's plan for me includes living in some really cool city for a few years. And if He wants to throw in an amazing but affordable place to live, awesome co-workers, and perhaps a desirable salary, I definitely wouldn't be opposed to it :).

This semester I have a graduate assistantship with Tri-District. I'll be at elementary schools on Tuesday & Thursday mornings, and I'll be at Arkansas Children's Hospital on Monday and Wednesday mornings. I am beyond excited for this :). So it's a safe bet that my next post will blab on and on about that! Seeee yaaaa.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

To pack? Or to unpack?

I've always had the desire to move somewhere new... where all I have is myself, a job and the Lord, & then see where He takes me from there. The thought of moving is scary, but it's one of those fears that excites me! I feel like after being stuck in Arkansas for 23 years, I need a little change of scenery. However, it scares the beegies out of me thinking about being in a new city with people I don't know, perhaps no one at all! Since high school, I've made such stable friends in Fayetteville and in Little Rock. I've established friendships that are so strong I can hardly bare the thought of being away from them for a few years, much less permanently! What if I can't build new ones that give me the same sense of security? What if I lose touch with those that I'm close to now, & then those friendships dwindle? Now THAT'S a scary thought! What if I hate the city? What if I can't afford it? What if I get blown away by a tornado or a hurricane? What if, what if, what if...

These worries only remind me that I'm not trusting God with all that I am. I need that friendly reminder: "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." -Jeremiah 29:11-13.

There's a specific city that has been popping up in my mind, & I'm not sure when or why I started thinking about it, but it's there. "Hurricane" by Jimmy Needham (I've included a link at the bottom) has been on repeat since I first heard it. There's a line in it that says, "I am Yours and You are mine. You know far better than I. And if destruction's what I need, then I'll receive it, Lord, from thee." I have no doubt in my mind that I would probably cry myself to sleep for a few weeks if I followed through with this whole moving thing. But, if that "destruction" is going to be the challenge I'm craving that tears my walls down so that God can reveal Himself to me more than ever, then so be it.

Of course, I'll be static in LR until next May, so I've got a lot of time to think about this. I prayed about this for the first time tonight, and I would appreciate nothing more than for you to pray for me, too! It's never too early to ask God for something :). You never know what could happen in a year!! I've been pretty emotional about this thought today, & if it's any indication as to how I'll feel about moving when it's really time to job hunt, I'm going to need all the praying I can get!

"Hurricane" by Jimmy Needham

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

3 leetle letters

Ok I'll just fill you in on every day since I last updated a month ago... Not really. :) That'd be way too much.

Chapter 7: A Willing Spirit

Though humans have so many ways of messing things up (ie procrastination, cough cough- me), God chooses to use the most unlikely people in the most unusual ways to perform His most perfect will. But it all starts with one word: yes. I don't know why God chose Mary to carry His Son, but she sure had the willingness to say yes to God instead of questioning and resisting Him--to lay down her own dreams so that God's plans could prevail. Yes: that simple, 3-letter word (unless you say si or wi, of course) that we tend to so often contradict. For it's one thing to want God's will and quite another to do it. A willing spirit, like Mary had, is a heart and mind that says yes to God and a will and a body that sets that yes in motion. Saying yes is our simple job. We don't have to accomplish God's will- that responsibility belongs to Him alone. After we say yes, all we have to do is follow through, one request at a time.

Truth: saying yes to God brings blessing, but it can also bring pain. That's why we need a submitted heart that keeps on believing... even when it hurts. But remember: God is who He says He is and He can and will do what He says He will do. God knows what He's doing. When we can't trace His hand, we must trust His heart. God always sees the bigger picture-- after all, it is He who is the Creator, the Alpha, the Omega, the Great Shepherd, the Overseer, our Father. He will use whatever method is needed to make us more like his Son, even if it hurts and even if we struggle to understand, for He makes all things new.

Do you find yourself listing the reasons you can't rather than the ways He can? ...Yep... Resisting His love rather than resting in His arms? ...Guilty... Mary lived a life that proved that great and important things always begin with saying yes to God, and then moving along one yes at a time. When you keep in mind that your whole life is holy ground, you keep yourself open to the wonderful opportunities He has planned for you. God's overall intention is to continue to bless you just as He already has. Although saying yes to the Lord means you may not know exactly where you'll end up, you can always find your way home.

Ironically a friend of mine was watching Jim Carrey's "Yes Man" earlier tonight. Without reading too far into the movie, I think it could be a good minimal analogy. And although we're not hypnotized or under a spell or anything, we should say yes to God, even when we're fearful and doubtful. All resistances aside, "Here I am. Send me," (Isaiah 6:8).

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Up to bat...

I could write a novel right now based on the recent events of my life. I feel like every day throws some sort of curve ball at me. Now I'm not too baseball savvy (although I would be kidding myself if I said I didn't like watching the players), but I'm pretty positive that's the one where you think the ball's gonna go one way; and then before you know it, it takes an unexpected turn & you're left thinking "What the [insert word here] just happened?" That, my friends, is a thought that has crossed my mind numerous times lately. I should have a journal solely called "Curve balls" where I write down everything that was unexpected and out-of-the-ordinary that day. That might be interesting! I have to disclaim, though, because not all curve balls are bad. I think curve balls are God's way of giving us a little break from a seemingly routine life. Sometimes they're minor bumps in the road (or potholes... "Did I do thaayut?"), and sometimes they're those minute things that make your day a little brighter. They can temporarily transform your mood, or they can change your life forever.

Now in my case, these particular baby curve balls have only reiterated the fact that life is anything but boring and predictable. Let's count these suckers...

Curve Ball #1: Victoria is finally sharing her secret with me...
In lieu of the [hopefully] beautiful weather in Destin next week (feels good to say that!) and the upcoming sunshiny days, I have already purchased my bulk of swimsuits for now. While I was picking out mix-n-match itsy bitsy bikinis, I noticed that Victoria's Secret was having a few special offers. Special offer #1: Free swim tote with purchase of certain swimsuits. Well, you slap the word "free" on something and I'm all over that ice cream... like sprankles. Special offer #2: Free VS Reward Card (worth at least $10) with any purchase. The card could be one of $10, $50, $100, or $500! I love me a good mystery :). Here's my thought process: Purchased separately, 4 swimsuit pieces = 4 free swim totes = 4 free reward cards ($40+). So I make 4 separate orders. Swimsuits come in, and 3 of the bags have not one but TWO reward cards!! For those of you that failed Advanced Math for the Not-So-Advanced-in-Math, that's 7 cards = $70+! You can imagine my excitement to get a) new swimsuits, b) 4 beach bags so we Auspies will all be chic on the beach, and c) not 4 but 7 gift cards! If that wouldn't throw your average day for a loop, then just stop reading now.

Curve Ball #2: Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookie disaster...
This pitch has 2 parts... Part 1. I decided to bake cookies last night to bring to aphasia group today. I get out the recipe and all the ingredients and mix them accordingly. After I finish filling up one cookie sheet, I look to the left & notice a bowl of pre-measured flour. Oops... forgot that! So I scrape the dough back into the bowl and get the beaters out, again. After the flour was all mixed in, I emptied the dough onto the cookie sheets & let them bake. With 3 minutes left, I take a little peek in the oven, and what I saw made my jaw and eyebrows part ways. I had apparently done 2 things wrong: too much dough per cookie and not enough space between each one! Each cookie sheet looked like I was making one big OCC cookie cake. (Not to mention they sort of tasted like plastic...) *Just a quick Q for all you bakers out there: how important is 1 tsp baking powder and 1 tsp baking soda? I didn't have either ingredient, so I just left them out. I didn't figure 2 tsps would be missed in the grand scheme of things...*
Part 2. Sweet, simple, & bake-free. I open the Quaker Oats box to pour them in the dough & I see 4 brown things in there that look like rocks. They were no-bake cookies from last summer that I hid from myself... & now they are paperweights. I must have thought it was brilliant: I'll hide these in here so I won't eat them so fast.(Notice the one on the bottom left that looks like a pancake... yep.)

Curve Ball #3: Just a classic case of the giggles...
I was about to work on auditory comprehension skills with one of my aphasic clients today. The plan: read a short story and have him answer "wh" questions about it. Take note: I hadn't looked at these stories prior to therapy, so I was unaware of what I was about to read to him. I start the first story: "Mac and Bell are brothers. Mac and Bell have a big house. The house has a big yard. The big yard has a big fence around it. Mac and Bell have a dog. The dog's name is Sam." It's safe to say my auditory feedback is well intact and I was fully aware of how stupid this sounded as I was reading it out loud. (Seriously... you read that quote out loud to yourself & see if you can refrain!) Every ounce of my being tried to hold back laughter, but I couldn't help it. I started cracking up... in the middle of therapy... & I'm covering my face with the stimulus book as I'm doing so. I apologize & return to the story: "Mac and Bell like to play with Sam." Oh no, here it comes again... Laughter. Middle of therapy. Covering my face again. Another apology where I acknowledge my lack of professionalism while secretly hoping Hutton isn't watching. I return to the passage: "Mac and Bell..." That's as far as I got before I started laughing again. This time even harder because by now I know that I can't control my laughing! And I'm talking full-out unstoppable giggles! I finally just closed the book and said, "We're not doing this today."

I'm out. ;)

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

It's past my bedtime...

This is so long overdue I honestly don't even know where to start or what to say without rambling like I always do. We're doing teacher evals in our classes this week- do we always do them this early? Is it really March already??

My "I'm gonna get in shape for Spring Break/summer starting Feb. 1" has been pushed back to "I'm gonna get in shape for Spring Break/summer starting March 1." Me & my procrastination habits... Why do I always find something to occupy myself when I am fully aware that I should be doing something more productive? Even something as pointless as organizing my binders from undergrad has kept me from doing what I need to be doing in the moment, such as SOAP notes, lesson plans, studying... you name it, I'm not doing it!

Glancing through "Having a Mary Spirit..." This book has changed my perspective on so many random things & I recommend it to anyone who is looking for a good book that will really initiate a change in them. Just about the whole section called Faith is Our Withdrawal Slip from the chapter "Dying to Live" is underlined. Here it is in a leetle nutshell:

A lot of Christians are like the hitch-hiker carrying a heavy load. The driver of a passing wagon offers him a ride, and as he joyfully accepts, he keeps his pack on his shoulders. The driver asks why he doesn't lay down his heavy load, his burden.
"Oh, I feel that is almost too much to ask you to carry me," the man said. "I could not think of letting you carry my burden too."
Like the man in the story, many of us continue to let this accumulated weight of the world bear down on us to where we are practically crawling. When, all along, Jesus has been waiting to bear our load.
Faith--believing that what Christ did on the cross was enough for me, for my life, for my situation--is our withdrawal slip. It is the debit card that accesses our account. For to settle for so little when Jesus provided so much is like having a billion dollars in our bank account and never using a penny.
It's as if God is telling us this: "Give me all. I don't want so much of your money and so much of your work--I want you. I have not come to torment your natural self, but to kill it. No half-measures are any good.... I will give you a new self instead. In fact I will give you myself, my own will shall become yours." (C.S. Lewis)
It's the great exchange. Christ's life for mine. The original holy makeover.

This chapter said a lot to me because so often do I think that no one wants to hear about my problems day-to-day. When in reality, there is One who wants to take them on... all of them! It's hard to fathom how I have any right to put all of my burdens on God, for He has already done so much for me. But, He is willing to let me cast all my cares on Him. He wants to take them from me- how cool is that?! I would be foolish to pass up the opportunity to hand over my worries to the Creator. It makes me think of the Cares Chorus: I cast all my cares upon You. I lay all of my burdens down at Your feet. At anytime I don't know what to do, I will cast all my cares upon You.

It is now officially March 4... one day closer to SBOneOh! I neeeeed/really really really want this break! To say I'm frickin ecstatic would be an understatement!! Can't wait to fill a few frilly pages in that "Auspie QB!!" :)


"This then is how we set our hearts at rest in his presence whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything." -1 John 3:19-20

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Something to think about

In honor of Valentine's Day (or Single's Awareness Day, whichever you prefer), I want to share with you something that was sent to me last week. So here goes:

"Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

God doesn't give us what we want. But He will give us our desires when they are first shaped by a delight in Him. In order to receive this promise, we must first meet the conditions attached to it: love God above all else. Verse 3 says to trust in the Lord. By doing so, our hearts will be seeking what He wants for us. Wanting the same thing God wants for us?! I can bet you that that will lead to lots of desires being met! Besides, I'm getting tired of begging God to want for me what I want for myself as if I know what's better for me than He does. And after all, His purpose for me can only be revealed when I put my full trust in Him and learn to seek His will for me.

When applying this to V-Day specifically, Marci put it pretty well: God wants us to have a man after Him. And we shouldn't settle for less. So... all my single ladies, flaunt your status! If Valentine's Day is all about love, then I'm celebrating the greatest love of all!

Take THAT, Valentine's Day!

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Just a little something..

It bugs me how since my last post, I've thought "Oh I need to blog about that!" plenty of times. Now that I'm here, I just don't know what to say. It's like writing a paper... the introduction paragraph is always the hardest for me!! Some people have said to write the paper, then go back and write the intro. Never done it, though!

UALR was closed Monday & Tuesday... you know what that means: no school AND no clinic!! Which turned out to be a pretty good thing because today was my day to lead Aphasia Group, and wouldn't you be surprised to find out that I hadn't typed up a lesson plan yet. Still haven't. I'll get around to that later on this week... after I study for Fluency Disorders & write Semester Treatment Plans & eat sushi with MG. Procrastination has made itself a priority in my life this semester, which is a really bad thing. It needs to go somewhere. Classes just aren't as interesting as they were last semester (with the exception of Dysphagia), and I'm sure my lack of motivation has something to do with it, too. It certainly doesn't help now that we can iChat & get on facebook during class. I need to kick this habit just as bad as Tejada needs to kick a fieldgoal... heh.

Hands & Voices was this past Saturday morning. Marcdawg & I met Ang at Starbucks at 8 then headed over to the Arkansas Children's Hospital East Campus. While parents were in the H&V seminar, we got to watch their chitlens. I try not to pick favorites, but it usually happens anyway. Most, but not all, of the kids had some kind of hearing loss. Some wore hearing aids, & some had cochlear implants. Some even had a BAHA.

This first picture is of a little boy with bilateral cochlear implants. He was the sweetest thing in the world, & he taught me lots of sign language words, like "eat" and "play." He & his brother (behind him) kind of took to me, & I kind of took to them also. Needless to say, I sort of followed them around all day... is that creepy? We played in a tub full of shaving cream.... & you can see how that worked out. It was all in their hair and on their clothes and all over us. They loved it!!

"Stolen Away on 55th & 3rd" by DMB just came on my iPod... I forget how much I love that song, & I think it's because of the saxophone in it- I find it sort of... seductive, in a way.

Okay people. I gotta study. 10-4.

(In about 5 minutes, I guarantee you that I will think of a billion more things to write about. But what good is a guarantee... you could sh!t in a box & put a guarantee on it, but at the end of the day it's still sh!t in a box.) --- name that movie!

Monday, February 1, 2010

"My clarinet brings all the boys to the yard." -LMcD

11:15 ... I should be in bed right now, but I'm not because I have recently become a huge fan of iChat. That wildfire spread like herpes & now all of us Auspies are going to flunk out of school because of it. So, thank you Apple for cheating us out of our careers.

While watching the ProBowl last night, we got to talking about the Haiti chaos. We talked about how sad it was-- & sad is an understatement! It's absolutely devastating that the poorest country in the West Hemisphere is having to endure this. It'd be a tragedy for anyone to have to go through something so destructive. Another thing I find disturbing (because I'm not sure whether to think of it as blunt journalism or horrific exploitation) are the pictures of the Haitians in the rubble. I came across a picture one day that instantly made me choke. It was a picture of a father holding his dead daughter (she looked somewhere from 6-9). The pain on his face was indescribable... something that I hope I never see ever again. Posting pictures of people all bloodied up and bruised and piled in the rubble is different- those pictures of course are sad & break my heart all the same. However, this one photo stood out to me and I just didn't know what to think about it being public. This father looked so helpless and vulnerable and heartbroken.

On a lighter note--an uplifting one--I slept in til 11:30 this morning! I didn't really mean to, but I turned my 10:00 alarm off thinking I would fall asleep for about 30 more minutes. Oopsies :). Anyway, I read a really good devotional when I woke up. I usually underline a few key phrases & what not, but today I think I underlined the whole page!! So of course I need to share this one with you, so I'll show you what I underlined. Here it goes:

Who Deserves the Credit?
When we experience success, it's easy to proclaim, "I did that!" It is very easy to overestimate the importance of our own achievements in comparison with what we owe others. In other words, reality breeds humility. The greatest among us are the humble servants who care less for their own glory and more for God's glory. If you're tempted to overestimate your own accomplishments, resist that temptation. Give credit where credit is due, starting with God. And, rest assured: There is no such thing as a self-made man. All of us are made by God, and He deserves the glory, not us. "We are never stronger than the moment we admit we are weak." -Beth Moore

I'll wrap this up, but I can't end this post without giving you faithful readers a recap of the Snow Days Twenty-Ten (even though you were there, hah!). In very little detail, this is how the weekend played out:
-Dinner at Tori's Thursday night... yum. yum. YUM! I think it's such a nice gesture when someone is willing to cook a lot of food for a lot of hungry, poor, living-on-student-loans graduate students!
-Friday: "The Edge of Darkness." SO. GOOD! (I love talking in periods... I like how it emphasizes!). Definitely a keep-you-on-the-edge-of-your-seat movie, which I love! Several parts in the movie made me not only jump, but scream. Yes, scream like a little girl. Afterwards- Tori's house... Scattergories & Catchphrase!! Built pyramids bc girls just... like to do that. I walk into Tori's living room just in time to catch the last few seconds of the pyramid fall as Katie arm-plants into Tori's glass coffee table!! We all nearly peed our pants laughing- or we did!
-Saturday: Game night at Weston's. Catchphrase and Scattergories... again! I love how Catchphrase somehow makes you spit out words that don't even exist, like "dumbos." Then back to Tori's only to play Catchphrase once more... "Black girls like to do this." "JUMPROPE!!" How in the world Tori guessed that on the very first try, I have no clue. & another: "He was an anti-semitic!" ... It was Walt Disney. I just don't get why he didn't say, "He has his own world in Orlando!" One small detail that I cannot leave out from this night: My dear friend, Lindsey, must've found inspiration in the X-Games when she decided to sled smack-dab into the front of a parked Suburban! How brave you are, Linds... we all love your battle wound :).
-Sunday: Bittersweet because it was the last snow day. The snice spoiled us! Mallory & I went to Weston's house to "watch the game." We get there & the Pro Bowl was about to start. Turns out we were watching that game, not the Razorback game! Then the Grammy's were on so of course we had to watch those.

One more funny story: Teach sang to us in class, today. "All assimilations, all assimilations, all assimilations, all assimilations" to the tune of B's "Single Ladies." ...Was def the highlight of class!

Ok this is plenty enough for one post... probably more than enough for two! Peace out, yo :)

Thursday, January 28, 2010

3rd post Woo Hoo!

WHEW! First week with adult aphasic clients is over with! If I'm completely honest, I was more nervous to work with them than I was to work with the little ones. I think it's safe to say that this semester will consist of a LOT less screaming and temper tantrums. A select few of you know just what I'm talking about! I find it arresting the reasons for older clients' therapy sessions. It's almost like they're living in reverse, to some sense. Think about it-- a child in therapy is more than likely there because their deficit is congenital. They deal with it and are given care for it from Day 1. On the other end of the spectrum, here are older clients who have had good educations and careers and families and stories... and then one day they have a stroke (or anything else, for that matter) and their life changes. It just blows my mind. That's the thing about speech therapy - the job opportunities are so broad... babies to old people, school districts to hospitals. Or we could just work with Brad Pitt. I think I've found my calling!!

Being a busy bee during the week makes the weekends THAT MUCH BETTER! We finally get a chance to relax and have fun and not think twice about why Spongebob's favorite pants are his favorite, as if we wanted to know in the first place. I can only wonder what this coming up weekend has in store... hopefully nothing that involves challenging gravity!! Because as most of us know from last weekend, gravity always wins. I love calling everyone on Saturday morning & sharing stories! And as far as this ice storm business goes, bring it on! I'm an experienced survivor :).

Keeping up with "Mary Spirit:"
Chapter 3 talks about that inner turmoil between wanting what God wants and wanting what we want. It describes Satan's role in all this. Satan isn't too worried about losing us to God. He is, on the other hand, bound and determined to keep us from being effective Christians. He's eager to constantly remind us of our failures and our unworthiness. He wants us to be so preoccupied all the time with what we're not that we never get around to realize all that God is. But Christ's sacrifice was enough. And "he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus," Phil 1:6. Whatever God has started in me, He's going to finish it. It's a constant changing, though...

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Do actions REALLY speak louder?

I believe I got "Having a Mary Spirit" for my high school graduation. I had it tucked away in a small chest that I brought to Little Rock, and as I was going around my room convincing myself that I wasn't overpacking for Christmas break when indeed I was, I grabbed a couple of books--"Mary Spirit" being one of them. I grabbed it from my suitcase one night at home. The subtitle reads "Allowing God to change us from the inside out." ...I thought that sounded like a pretty good plan, so I dug in.

Chapter 1 is simply called "A Mary Spirit." ... I can already tell that this will be hard. It would be so much easier to simply tell you to go buy this book & read it for yourself. ... Luke 10:38-42 tells a story of 2 sisters: Martha & Mary. Jesus visited their home, and Martha was freaking out because she felt like she was doing all the work while Mary just sat there and listened to Him. Martha rebuked and asked why Mary was doing nothing. Jesus responded to Martha and told her, "Only one thing is needed." It's easy to get so caught up in the busyness of life that sometimes I forget about that "one thing" that is needed - to sit at Jesus's feet. I tend to forget to just... be still. Joanna goes on to say that Martha & Mary had to "learn the balance between a soul at rest and a body in motion, between working hard for Christ and sitting at His feet." That's what I need- to learn that balance. I want to be changed to have a Mary spirit and learn to sit at the feet of the One who leads me. Ok, Lord... here we go.

Chapter 2 is where I had my first big "Aha!" moment. Joanna writes, "I assumed that Christian perfection was an outer work I had to do." That caught my attention. What? Isn't it, though? "If I could just be good enough and do the right things, then I would please God." Ok... go on. "But in my heartfelt desire to serve and honor the Lord, I feel prey to ... the lie that holiness is all up to us." Wait... it's not? There I was, realizing that the dangerous belief that I had to make myself presentable to God through my own human efforts was all a lie that Satan had planted in my mind. And boy, did he reap & sow on that lie.

I struggled a lot in undergrad with this issue. I felt like I had gotten so caught up in everything--sorority, partying, meeting people--and I began to neglect my spiritual life... put it on the back-burner, if you will. When I hit some low points & realized that I needed to mend this part of my life, I didn't know where to start. I began going to church on a somewhat regular basis & reading daily devotionals ever so often, etc. I tried to monitor my words and actions. But as we all know, people fall. As I read through Chapter 2, it became more and more apparent that my human actions are not what is going to bring me closer to God. Contradictory to what I had unconsciously thought before, I didn't need to prove myself worthy of anything- because I'm not worthy. No one is, nor will anyone ever be. Salvation is a gift, not a job. And it is all up to mwah to decide to accept this gracious gift. For it is freely given.

It was when I read the following words that I could have sworn that this chapter was written ABOUT me and directly TO me:
"I somehow fell for the lie that when I accepted Jesus as my Savior, the rest was up to me. As though, after an initial warm hug of welcome, God had tossed me into the sea of life, stepped back, and crossed His arms as if to say 'It's up to you now, sweetheart--sink or swim.'"
BaDaBING! I didn't know what exactly it was that I had been struggling with until I read that line. That's it! That's the lie that has me stuck in this rut! My Christianity and my salvation is not dependent upon me and my actions... it's through the grace of God. Now I've known since I was a little girl that there is one and only one way to God, but like Joanna said, I believed that after that initial "Come into my heart" prayer, it was all up to me. But it's not. I began to realize that all I had to do was follow Him. I have a God who understands that I am caught in the middle of humanly contradictions. I want God one minute and I chase the world the next. Jesus not only understands my weaknesses, but he has the power and the know-how to help me change. He peels back my sin like an onion, revealing one layer at a time. He exposes my weaknesses, then shows me how to change.

There were many parts of chapter 2 that I had to re-read. This book was proving to be a bit more complex than I had bargained for. I was expecting to pick it up and read bullet points on how to become a better person spiritually. "Good deeds: check. Church: check. Prayer: check." Boy, was I in for a ride as I realized that this was going to be about self-evaluation and application in my own life. This should be interesting...

Saturday, January 23, 2010

I'll try anything once...

Ok... I give in. After following Lindsey's blog for only a few weeks, I've decided to jump on the bandwagon of blogging. And yes, it was I who, just a few weeks ago, said I would never "blog" ... whatever that means anyway. I didn't (& still don't, really) see myself as the kind of person to "blog about my ideals," as the Twix commercial puts it. But sometimes when writing in my diary, my brain works way faster than my poor fine motor skills do. Therefore, I end up having all these thoughts that I want to put down but by the time I finish one sentence I forget what I was thinking about writing next.

One of the main reasons I've decided to succumb... to conform... to this blogging world is because of the book I'm currently reading: "Having a Mary Spirit" by Joanna Weaver. I have underlined and starred so many phrases, paragraphs, scriptures. And although writing about some of them in my diary gives me some way of regurgitating what I've read, some of it is just too good to keep to myself. I realize that this blog (which will probably be re-named over & over because of my indecisiveness) will not be read by tons & tons of people. The group of people who read this will probably consist of a select few. Still, some of the things I read in this book SCREAM to me, "This is YOU, Ashley! Apply THIS to your life! And THIS! And THIS!" So, as I am halfway through the book, I plan on going back to the beginning and sharing the points that stand out to me and speak to me in hopes that they will speak to you, too (whoever you are).

We'll see how this goes :)